Show, don't tell
“Show me Bob walking across the room to turn on the heat,
don’t tell me.” What? What does that mean?
I didn’t get it, if I wrote that Bob walked across the room to
turn on the heat, the reader should know he was cold why wasn’t that showing
them? I didn’t study creative writing as most published authors did.
Oh, sure I had a gift of storytelling, but not a clue how to properly put that
story into words. I had to learn one baby step at a time.
But still I have come to find out that the show, don’t
tell thing is a hard concept for even the most studied authors to learn.
It took two books, a few frustrated editors, and the start
of the third book for the light to finally come on for me. Show, don't
tell allows the reader to be in the room with Bob as he walks
across it. They can hear the boards creek beneath his feet or feel the icy
chill on his arms as gooseflesh begins to rise. Describing the walk and cold through action words, thoughts, senses, and feelings
rather than just saying he did it, makes the reader part of the story. By describing
the scene in such a way, the reader can draw his or her own conclusions.
Telling: Bob walked across the room to turn up the
heat.
Showing: The stone floor
chilled Bob’s bare feet the moment he stepped onto it. Pulling the
blanket around his shoulders he headed toward the thermostat.
In the
“showing” example, rather than merely saying that Bob walked across the room to
turn on the heat the reader experiences the cold from the stone floor on his
feet, and pulling the blanket around his shoulders shows he’s cold. The reader
can deduce the same information they would get from the “telling” example but
in a much more compelling way.
Showing also
helps develop characters in a way that is not just listing their good or bad traits.
For example, rather than telling your readers that “Bob is self-centered,” you
could show this characteristic in him by writing a scene where he whines
about something someone did to him, but he’s oblivious to the fact that he
himself is guilty of doing the same thing to others. Or if his character is an extremely strong-minded
person, show him persevering through something — don’t just say “he was determined.”
The reader should be able to
imagine themselves in that very setting.
The Russian
playwright Anton Chekhov said "Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of
light on broken glass."
Overall, when done right, showing draws readers into the
narrative. It contributes to story development but also leaves certain things
up to the reader’s interpretation, which is much more interesting than making
everything explicit.
The bottom line: telling might be quicker, and it’s
certainly necessary to have some telling in every story but showing should
almost always be your prime strategy.
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